Guaran regained consciousness around the time the sunrise bell tolled at 6 a.m. in the distance. Still unsteady on his feet, Fei Ling carried a lantern and accompanied the two through the bamboo forest.
Snowflakes fluttered down since morning, and the clouds hung low in the sky.
Princess Lisha bowed her head until Fei Ling turned back. Guaran , though he did not speak much, expressed his gratitude by bowing deeply.
When Fei Ling returned to her quarters, the faint scent of smoke mingled with the aroma of medicinal herbs greeted her. Peeking nervously into the room, she spotted Zhen sitting on the humble bedding.
“Well, I made myself at home,” Zhen said weakly, waving his sleeve with a faint smile.
“I couldn’t sleep a wink,” he added.
Why he came here, despite that, was a mystery. For someone who usually kept his composure, he looked unusually exhausted. His arm was wrapped in bandages. Fei Ling could easily guess how he got hurt, which made her words catch in her throat. She sighed, placed the lantern down, and sat beside Zhen.
“…Lanxin will be here soon, so be gone by then. She says being around you gives her chills,” Fei Ling said.
“Ha, I dislike Lanxin just as much,” Zhen retorted.
“Lanxin is a good girl,” Fei Ling replied.
“Is she? She used to be an assassin, yet you trust her. I can’t stand her. I also dislike Li Xue Mei,” Zhen said with disdain.
“How ridiculous. Is there anyone you do like?” Fei Ling asked.
Zhen remained silent, then leaned against her shoulder.
“Don’t worry. Lanxin won’t come until around noon,” he murmured.
“You didn’t do something to her, did you?”
“Just a little something in her room. Harmless bugs, but she hates them, right? She’s probably tearing apart her wardrobe chasing them right now,” Zhen said with a smirk.
Poor Lanxin. She was undoubtedly shrieking and battling the insects at this very moment.
“…”
Questions surfaced one after another in Fei Ling’s mind. Why did Zhen poison Guaran ? Why did he possess the jade pendant engraved with the Kirin crest?
But she chose to stay silent. Zhen wasn’t saying anything about it. He surely knew that Princess Lisha and Guaran had been here earlier, and that Fei Ling had neutralized the poison. Yet he didn’t mention any of it.
For now, she decided to remain by his side, neither as a feng shui master nor as a medicinal practitioner—just as herself.
Zhen lay down on the bedding. Was he going to sleep? Fei Ling blinked, wondering if he truly came here just to rest. Then, he grabbed her arm and pulled her close.
“You should sleep too,” he said.
Fei Ling collapsed against Zhen’s chest.
“You have dark circles. You haven’t been sleeping much, have you?”
“…It’s nothing but nightmares. I don’t want to dream at all,” Fei Ling confessed.
Dreams where the late emperor assaulted her, or where the current emperor changed his mind and had her executed. Even in sleep, there was no peace.
But the most terrifying dream wasn’t one of being killed.
(A dream where Mother just silently glares at me… I’d rather not sleep than see that again.)
Zhen ran his fingers through her hair and brought his lips close.
“…I’ve introduced a new poison. Human poison can be replaced. With this one, I might be able to poison you just a little,” he whispered.
His kiss was quiet and tender.
The numbing sensation of sleep flowed from her lips to her throat, spreading to her chest and head. The poison triggered her heartbeat to quicken, but the pull of sleep was stronger.
“You won’t dream. I’ll destroy them for you,” Zhen said.
“I see. Then shatter them to pieces,” Fei Ling replied.
Resting her head against his arm, she closed her eyes.
Though they had been at odds, with Zhen’s poison battling hers just this morning, now their time together felt inexplicably serene. But next time they met, Fei Ling would demand to know why he had tried to kill Princess Lisha’s eunuch, and Zhen would undoubtedly hurt and provoke her again.
Their relationship defied any clear description.
(Love, huh…)
It was the most unsuitable word, yet it came to mind.
That thought, too, scattered as Fei Ling drifted into a gentle slumber. Just as her consciousness slipped away, a tingling heat touched her neck. Another kiss.
“…I love you. I don’t need anything else,” Zhen murmured.
The meaning of his words escaped her already-drowsy mind, leaving only the faint, sorrowful resonance of his voice lingering in her ears.
“So let me take you with me.”
